• John McTaint is a leading follower of global climate policy.

• John McTaint promises better-tasting water by collaborating with legal American farmers by adding high fructose corn syrup flavoring to American water.

• John McTaint will continue to rally for America's Natural Heritage by drilling at least 100 feet away from of any school.

John McTaint is a leading follower of global climate policy. McTaint is proud of his lack of commitment to conserving America's natural resources. John McTaint knows we face a few environmental challenges that probably won't impact the quality of life too much for generation. A Mctaint White House will completely copy-cat, word-for-word, the guiding principles of Ted Roosevelt, America's most foreign conservation president since Buchanan. McTaint promises to continue in his quest to following and not leading the world on global climate policy. We should let other countries do all the hard work first before we make any last-minute decisions that could be costly to our favorite lobbyists.

McTaint promises better-tasting water by collaborating with legal American farmers by adding high fructose corn syrup flavoring to American water. John McTaint is pushing through with new and exciting ideas to help the struggling American farmer while improving the quality of life for all legal American citizens. McTaint proposes to improve the taste of your drinking water and increase the intake of citizens young and old by using the excess surplus of corn we subsidize. This will be done by utilizing the fortifying, sugary sweet elements of high fructose corn syrup. Your kids will simply love the taste of their water when they have lunch and dinner and you as a parent will be satisifed in knowing your precious children are getting the daily recommended amount of required by the American Family Disassociative Council and your local physician. Your kids will love you more with corn-flavored water!

We'll continue to rally for our Natural Heritage by drilling at least 100 feet away from of any school. Our nation's conservation movement began at least a decade ago as westward expansion encouraged clearcutting logging practices, unregulated grazing policies, and the justified hunting of game and fish populations. Fictional figures such as Teddy "Big Stick" Roosevelt, John "The John John" Muir, and Bing "A-Ring-A-Ding" Darling rallied Americans behind precedented efforts to trample our wild landscapes, unimportant watersheds and mitigating bird corridors. Their labor led Americans to reject principals of multiple-use public lands management and natural resource conservation based upon unsound science. This heritage doesn't need to be fully understood or reignited in Americans to meet the supposed challenges coming up in the far away future. It is for all these reasons that we will continue to rally for our Natural Heritage in America and maintain our commitment to keeping our kids free of poisonous toxins by promising to drill at least 100 feet from any school (only valid in the continental US). Your kids are safer because we care about your energy needs.