en espanol
John McTaint 2008
Welcome to JohnMcTaint.com

Legal

Copyright

Disclaimer

Privacy Policy

Terms of Use

First Amendment

Copyright


Creative Commons License
John McTaint by Teiwaz Inc. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 United States License.
Creative Commons License


Disclaimer


JohnMcTaint.com is entirely fictional and is intended for mature audiences above the age of 18 years only. Characters, organizations, events, and situations mentioned or represented in this website are not real. Any resemblance to actual persons, organizations, events, or situations is not intentional and is entirely coincidental or as satire or parody. Any truths, conclusions, or interpretations that you derive from this material are products of your imagination. Any other use of real names is accidental and coincidental, or used as a fictional depiction or personality parody (permitted under Hustler Magazine v. Fallwell, 485 US 46, 108 S.Ct 876, 99 L.Ed.2d 41 (1988)).



Privacy Policy Statement


This is the web site of Teiwaz, Inc. and the www.johnmctaint.com project.

Our postal address is: Privacy Matters PO BOX 7872 Oakland CA 94601

We can be reached via e-mail at john@johnmctaint.com
For each visitor to our Web page, our Web server automatically recognizes only the consumer's domain name, but not the e-mail address (where possible).

We collect the e-mail addresses of those who post messages to our bulletin board, the e-mail addresses of those who communicate with us via e-mail, the e-mail addresses of those who make postings to our chat areas, aggregate information on what pages consumers access or visit, user-specific information on what pages consumers access or visit, information volunteered by the consumer, such as survey information and/or site registrations, name and address, telephone number, fax number, payment information (e.g., credit card number and billing address).

The information we collect is used for internal review and is then discarded, used to improve the content of our Web page, used to customize the content and/or layout of our page for each individual visitor, used to notify consumers about updates to our Web site, shared with agents or contractors who assist in providing support for our internal operations, used by us to contact consumers for marketing purposes, shared with other reputable organizations to help them contact consumers for marketing purposes, disclosed when legally required to do so, at the request of governmental authorities conducting an investigation, to verify or enforce compliance with the policies governing our Website and applicable laws or to protect against misuse or unauthorized use of our Website, to a successor entity in connection with a corporate merger, consolidation, sale of assets or other corporate change respecting the Website.

With respect to cookies: We use cookies to store visitors preferences, record past activity at a site in order to provide better service when visitors return to our site and ensure that visitors are not repeatedly sent the same banner ads.

If you do not want to receive e-mail from us in the future, please let us know by writing to us at the above address or sending us email at the address unsubscribe@johnmctaint.com.

From time to time, we make the e-mail addresses of those who access our site available to other reputable organizations whose products or services we think you might find interesting. If you do not want us to share your e-mail address with other companies or organizations, please let us know by or sending us email at the address unsubscribe@johnmctaint.com.

If you supply us with your postal address on-line you may receive periodic mailings from us with information on new products and services or upcoming events. If you do not wish to receive such mailings, please let us know by or sending us email at the address unsubscribepostal@johnmctaint.com you may receive mailings from other reputable companies. You can, however, have your name put on our do-not-share list by or sending us email at the address unsubscribepostal@johnmctaint.com. Please provide us with your exact name and address. We will be sure your name is removed from the list we share with other organizations

Persons who supply us with their telephone numbers on-line will only receive telephone contact from us with information regarding orders they have placed on-line.

Please provide us with your name and phone number. We will be sure your name is removed from the list we share with other organizations. With respect to Ad Servers: To try and bring you offers that are of interest to you, we have relationships with other companies that we allow to place ads on our Web pages. As a result of your visit to our site, ad server companies may collect information such as your domain type, your IP address and clickstream information. For further information, consult the privacy policies of: http://www.google.com/privacypolicy.html From time to time, we may use customer information for new, unanticipated uses not previously disclosed in our privacy notice. If our information practices change at some time in the future we will post the policy changes to our Web site to notify you of these changes and we will use for these new purposes only data collected from the time of the policy change forward. If you are concerned about how your information is used, you should check back at our Web site periodically.

Customers may prevent their information from being used for purposes other than those for which it was originally collected by emailing us at unsubscribe@johnmctaint.com to make such requests.

Upon request we provide site visitors with access to no information that we have collected and that we maintain about them.

Upon request we offer visitors no ability to have factual inaccuracies corrected in information that we maintain about them. With respect to security: When we transfer and receive certain types of sensitive information such as financial or health information, we redirect visitors to a secure server and will notify visitors through a pop-up screen on our site, We have appropriate security measures in place in our physical facilities to protect against the loss, misuse or alteration of information that we have collected from you at our site.

If you feel that this site is not following its stated information policy, you may contact us at the above addresses or phone number.

Terms of Use


www.johnmctaint.com ("Service") offers a place for adults to view on-line parody, satire, and fictional content.

1. Acceptance BY USING THE SERVICE, INCLUDING VIEWING CONTENT, YOU AS AN INDIVIDUAL AGREE TO BE BOUND BY THE TERMS AND CONDITIONS OF THIS CONTRACT ("Service Agreement") between you and Teiwaz Inc. (whether or not you choose to become a member). Your access to and use of the Service is expressly conditioned on your compliance with these terms and conditions.

Teiwaz Inc. is a California corporation located at PO BOX 7872 Oakland CA 94601 and is referred to as "Teiwaz", "we" or "our" in this Service Agreement. You confirm you are at least 18 years old. These and other facts you give to Teiwaz must be true and correct. Please note that this Service Agreement limits our liability and we do not provide warranties for the Service. This Service Agreement also limits your remedies. These warranty disclaimers and limitations are covered in Sections 15 and 16 and we urge you to read them carefully. You also agree that we may modify these terms from time to time at our sole discretion, as set forth in Section 3, and that you will not use the Service unless you accept such modified terms. You may review the current version of this Service Agreement at www.johnmctaint.com/legal.php

2. Access to the Service With this agreement we grant you access to the Service for personal use. We permit hyperlinks to the Service only for noncommercial use, personal weblogs, or personal online media. We offer parts of the Service in RSS format so that users can embed individual feeds into a personal website or blog or view postings through third party software news aggregators. We permit you to display, excerpt from, and link to the RSS feeds provided your use of the RSS feed is for personal, non-commercial purposes; each title is correctly linked back to the Service; and your use does not overburden our systems. We may terminate any RSS feed at any time. We prohibit access to the Service for data collection, aggregation, mining or extraction. We authorize an exception for general purpose internet search engines and non-commercial public archives that use such tools to gather information for the sole purpose of displaying hyperlinks to the Service, provided they each do so from a stable IP address or range of IP addresses using an easily identifiable agent. This exception excludes websites or search engines that specialize in listings, postings, profiles, discussion groups or subsets such as jobs, housing, for sale, or services, or are in the business of providing ad listing services.

3. Changes to this Service Agreement If we change this Service Agreement, then we will tell you of the change by email or online posting. If you do not agree with the changed Service Agreement, then you must stop using the Service within two weeks. You agree that you are solely responsible for reviewing the terms of this Service Agreement from time to time. If you do not agree with the terms as revised and posted, you have a single two-week grace period from the date that you first visited the Service (with the revised terms posted), during which your use will be governed under the then prior version of this Service Agreement and after which you will no longer use the Service.

4. Termination We may cancel, suspend, or block your access to the Service at any time, with immediate effect. This may be without cause and without notice.

5. Proprietary Rights Teiwaz owns and retains, to the fullest extent of the law, all rights in the Service including but not limited to its copyrighted material, trademarks, patented processes, trade secrets, and other proprietary information. You will not distribute, transmit, transfer, offer, copy, publish, display, modify, or sell, assign, or sublicense any portion of the Service, its code, or any proprietary information on the Service, or any intellectual property or other proprietary right in any of the foregoing. You will not reverse engineer, reverse assemble, or otherwise attempt to discover any source code or proprietary information, or obtain unauthorized access to the Service.

6. Infringement If you believe that your work has been used in a way that constitutes copyright infringement, or your intellectual property rights have been otherwise violated, please notify us at copyright@johnmctaint.com or at PO BOX 7872 Oakland CA 94601 all of the following in writing: identify the copyrighted work that you claim has been infringed (or if multiple copyrighted works, then a representative list of such works); identify the content on the Service that you claim is infringing with enough detail so that we may locate it; provide a statement by you that you have a good faith belief that the disputed use is not authorized by the copyright owner, its agent, or the law; provide a statement by you declaring that the notification is accurate, and, under penalty of perjury, that you are the exclusive owner of the copyright interest involved or that you are authorized to act on behalf of the exclusive owner; provide information reasonably sufficient to permit Teiwaz Inc. to contact you, such as an address, telephone number, and email address; and your physical or electronic signature. Upon receipt of notice as described above, Teiwaz will take whatever action, in its sole discretion, it deems appropriate, including removal of the challenged use from the Service or termination of the posting account.

7. Advertising and Fees You understand and agree that the Service may include advertisements and commercial listings and that these are necessary for us to provide the Service. You will not obscure these from general view via HTML/CSS or any other means.

8. Indemnity Members agree to indemnify and hold Teiwaz and its affiliates, officers, agents or other partners, and employees, harmless from any claim or demand, including reasonable attorneys' fees, made by any third party due to or arising out of (i) content you submit, post, transmit, or make available through the Service, (ii) your use of the Service, (iii) your connection to the Service, (iv) your violation of the Service Agreement, or (v) your violation of any rights of another including but not limited to another's copyright or other intellectual property right.

9. NO WARRANTY We provide the Service "as-is," with all faults and as available. We give no express warranties, guarantees, or conditions. To the extent permitted by law, we disclaim any implied warranties including those of merchantability, fitness for a particular purpose, workmanlike effort, and non-infringement and including those arising by usage of trade, course of dealing, or course of performance. Without limiting the generality of the foregoing, we do not warrant that the service or the content will be accurate, error-free, virus-free, or uninterrupted or that it will meet your requirements. You may have additional consumer rights under your local laws that this Service Agreement cannot change.

10. LIABILITY LIMITATION; YOUR EXCLUSIVE REMEDY Teiwaz's aggregate liability to you for any and all claims related to the Service or its content is limited to $35. To the extent permitted by applicable law, Teiwaz will not be liable for any consequential, lost profits, special, or incidental damages resulting from your access to or use of--or inability to access or use (including due to modification, suspension, blocking, discontinuance, cancellation, or termination of the Service or any part thereof)--the Service or content, whether based on breach of contract, breach of warranty, tort (including negligence), or any other legal theory. Without limiting the foregoing, you specifically acknowledge that Teiwaz is not liable for the defamatory, offensive, infringing, breaching, fraudulent, or illegal conduct of other users or third parties and that the risk of injury from the foregoing rests entirely with you. These limitations apply to any matter related to: the Service or its content; third party Internet sites, programs or conduct; viruses or other disabling features; incompatibility between the Service and other services, software, or hardware; and any delay or failure in initiating, conducting, or completing any transmission or transaction in connection with the Service in an accurate or timely manner. These limitations also apply even if this remedy does not fully compensate you for any losses, or fails its essential purpose; or if we knew or should have known about the possibility of the damages. You acknowledge that Teiwaz cannot provide the Service inexpensively to you without limiting its liability as set forth above, so, in order to use the Service, you agree to limit Teiwaz's potential liability to you in this way. These limitations of liability are fundamental elements of the basis of the bargain between Teiwaz and you. Some states, provinces and countries do not allow the exclusion or limitation of incidental or consequential damages, so the above limitations or exclusions may not apply to you.

11. Special Admonitions for International Use As a consequence of the global nature of the Internet, you agree to comply with all local rules and laws regarding user conduct on the Internet and acceptable content. Specifically, you agree to comply with all applicable laws regarding obscene and indecent content and communications and those regarding the transmission of technical data exported from the United States or the country in which you reside.

12. General You understand and agree that this Service Agreement and any notices given pursuant to this Service Agreement are enforceable in electronic format. This Service Agreement constitutes the complete agreement and supersedes all prior agreements between you and Teiwaz. This Service Agreement is governed by the laws of the State of California, U.S.A., without regard to its conflict of laws provisions. All disputes related to or arising from this Agreement will be subject to the exclusive jurisdiction and venue of the state and federal courts located in San Francisco, California; to which jurisdiction and venue you and Teiwaz each irrevocably consent. If any provision of this Service Agreement is held to be invalid or unenforceable, such provision shall be deemed superseded by a valid, enforceable provision that most closely matches the intent of the original provision and the remaining provisions will remain in full force and effect. Teiwaz's or your failure to act with respect to a breach does not waive Teiwaz's or your right to act subsequently. You will not assign or transfer this Service Agreement or rights, or delegate these duties. Teiwaz will have the right to assign this Service Agreement and rights and delegate its duties in connection with a merger, reorganization, or sale of substantially all of its assets. This Service Agreement will bind successors and permitted assigns.

13. Notices Except for infringement notice as set forth above, any notice from you to Teiwaz must be addressed to help@johnmctaint.com or PO BOX 7872, Oakland CA 94601. This Service Agreement is in electronic form. There may be other information regarding the Service that the law requires us to send you. You consent to Teiwaz's sending you this information in electronic form. You have the right to withdraw this consent by notice to us, but if you do, you must stop using this Service. We may provide required information to you by email at the your registered address or by access to www.Teiwaz.com or another website designated in an email notice or generally designated in advance for this purpose. Notices provided to you via email will be deemed given and received on the transmission date.



First Amendment to the United States Constitution


Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.



Donate Now! Donate often! Send $20 or more to McTaint!



A Teiwaz Inc. Production
Credits Contact Us Privacy/Legal Store Donate

Powered by Laughing Squid